Becoming who I want to be.
This posting is the result of some time I have spent being introspective lately. It's on the "deeper" side of my thinking, so bear with me....
I have definitely been feeling all of the changes in life lately and am trying to learn from all of them in the process of becoming who I want to be. With all of this meditation, I have come to a few conclusions. I will divide this into categories for ease of reading. :)
Current Changes Taking Place
-I am very uncomfortable with change and have been experiencing a great sense of insecurity lately. Life has been different since my graduation and move in December. Most of the changes have been positive, but they are changes and tough to adjust to regardless.
-I spent 4 1/2 years at college being very comfortable with where I was both educationally and socially. I am no longer living in familiar territory, and am beginning to meet people and make friends here, but it takes time.
-I was in Lincoln tonight and was reminded of how much I miss the comfort of knowing people. I ran into several people in town who I knew. I chatted with some old friends, and even got some hugs. This was so comforting. Some days, I miss going to the mall and running into a minimum of 3 people I know on each trip.
-I was also reminded tonight that there are people who understand me entirely and are there to help me through times like this.
What I'm scared of
-Losing friendships. I have felt a great strain on a friendship that I considered very close before graduating and moving. I have been advised to try and "let things go" and "be how they will," but it's so hard. Every time I interact with this person, I am reminded of the kind of friends that I feel we no longer are.
Who I Want To Be/Things I'd Like to Accomplish
-I take these 3 goals I try to live by from a sermon I heard back at LSC.
1. Be close to God
2. Live a life of significance
3. Leave a legacy
-These goals are how I try to live. In addition, I want to make tough times more bearable for people, I want to make a difference, I want to be in love, I want to live close to my immediate family and travel to visit my other family members, I want to be happy, I want others to be happy, I want to stay busy, I want to be involved in church, I want to be needed, I want to be physically in shape, I want to harvest friendships that will last a lifetime.
Basically what I'm getting at is that this is a time in life when many changes take place. It's an exciting time of life, but it's so scary too. Life is quite the adventure and I'm along for the ride!
I have definitely been feeling all of the changes in life lately and am trying to learn from all of them in the process of becoming who I want to be. With all of this meditation, I have come to a few conclusions. I will divide this into categories for ease of reading. :)
Current Changes Taking Place
-I am very uncomfortable with change and have been experiencing a great sense of insecurity lately. Life has been different since my graduation and move in December. Most of the changes have been positive, but they are changes and tough to adjust to regardless.
-I spent 4 1/2 years at college being very comfortable with where I was both educationally and socially. I am no longer living in familiar territory, and am beginning to meet people and make friends here, but it takes time.
-I was in Lincoln tonight and was reminded of how much I miss the comfort of knowing people. I ran into several people in town who I knew. I chatted with some old friends, and even got some hugs. This was so comforting. Some days, I miss going to the mall and running into a minimum of 3 people I know on each trip.
-I was also reminded tonight that there are people who understand me entirely and are there to help me through times like this.
What I'm scared of
-Losing friendships. I have felt a great strain on a friendship that I considered very close before graduating and moving. I have been advised to try and "let things go" and "be how they will," but it's so hard. Every time I interact with this person, I am reminded of the kind of friends that I feel we no longer are.
Who I Want To Be/Things I'd Like to Accomplish
-I take these 3 goals I try to live by from a sermon I heard back at LSC.
1. Be close to God
2. Live a life of significance
3. Leave a legacy
-These goals are how I try to live. In addition, I want to make tough times more bearable for people, I want to make a difference, I want to be in love, I want to live close to my immediate family and travel to visit my other family members, I want to be happy, I want others to be happy, I want to stay busy, I want to be involved in church, I want to be needed, I want to be physically in shape, I want to harvest friendships that will last a lifetime.
Basically what I'm getting at is that this is a time in life when many changes take place. It's an exciting time of life, but it's so scary too. Life is quite the adventure and I'm along for the ride!
posted by Steph at
12:03 AM
2 Comments:
Steph, I just wanted to say it's been amazing to watch you grow as a person in the few years that I've known you. I'm glad that you want to continue to grow to be an even more amazing person than you already are.
By
Anonymous, at 2:31 PM
Steph, you have wonderful goals for your life. I also want to add that the person you will become will be a beautiful person inside because you have a great foundation laid already. I'm confident you will make a difference in the lives of others for the better.
With the scary friendship thing, maybe you should try working on it again. I know you tried to have a conversation or two with the other person and it didn't work out so well, but it might be worth a shot to try it again. It will be akward, but it if works it will be so worth it and not akward once the ball starts rolling.
By
Unknown, at 11:36 AM
Post a Comment
<< Home